heroin

It’s Heroin Time

I dream of a serene ending, sweetie.
A terminal taste
I’ve never licked on my lips.
When the sun sets, I want to die.                                                                                        
Every dusk of every day
and every night
I want to die.

I am naked in front of absolute pain, sweetie.
I’m cold.
I climb an ancient mountain of ice,
at the end of the world.
I want to go back
to before I was born.
My abusive hand 
can’t stop beating my mind.
I’m cold.

Sophisticated clothes are being sold for ideas, sweetie.
People say I’m beautiful,
a little crazy in the eye-
I think of myself
as a terrible fish.

I live behind their exclamation marks, sweetie.
I can’t keep my voice straight.
I fall on my knees,
talk to chaos. 
People reply in stereo,
saying everyone loves me.
I ask for their true names.

Pseudo-Democracy is pulling us apart, sweetie.
We shrink our hearts
and raise our egos. 
In haunted moments
in my sleep
I kill each one of us.

But you’ll feel for me, sweetie.
You’ll make sure
I dim my dream,
lying still-
you’ll take me to nothing.
No-one will ever believe that I.

 

© Niki Andrikopoulou 2009